Sometimes it’s rare to meet someone that can be assertive without being unkind or abrasive. Most of us though look up to and respect someone that has the confidence, strength, and tact to hold others accountable and manage confrontation with ease.
It can take some time, but setting boundaries and becoming more assertive are skills that can be learned. There may be perfectly good reasons why you have not acquired these skills already, but it can dramatically change your life when you have them. What acquiring these skills can lead to is improved stress, improved relationships, and improved self-worth.
Setting limits helps you to set limits with yourself and others. You can begin to delegate and say no to taking on too much on your plate, and develop more awareness of your limits before burnout.
Practicing those things can greatly improve your stress. As you begin to be more assertive, you change the dynamics in your relationships and manage interactions better. Not always, but many times, you can shift that people have historically treated you. That old saying that people only treat us the way we allow them to treat us is very true. Many times we can give even a little push back on the way others are treating us and it can improve their respect in us, which can greatly improve the relationship. We can also set more limits on the level of participation we engage in with conflict, be firm about limits on others showing cruelty and disrespect, and firm on expectations for our relationships.
In the end, making subtle yet firm adjustments in our behaviors and approaches can dramatically improve our confidence. We begin to hold the expectation of better treatment from others and in the end we can hold our head of higher.
Call one of our Boundary/Assertiveness counselors today for help with Boundaries and Assertiveness issues.